Shoe size

So since all four of my boys are playing basketball this year, and boys' feet tend to grow at an enormously fast rate, they were all due for some new shoes. Not just any shoes, though. Real, expensive, name-brand basketball shoes. That they are only allowed to wear on the court. That are kept in their gym bag and carried into the game or practice and then the kids can change shoes once they are inside. That they put back in their bag once they are ready to go back outside. Great concept, has worked wonderfully well for years. Until this year. Somehow, we managed to lose an entire bag and the super expensive name-brand shoes inside it. Not only that, but these shoes were purchased by his father (my soon-to-be-ex) who is not so forgiving of the inevitable accidents of childhood, like losing a pair of shoes. To make matters worse, these shoes were on clearance when he bought them several weeks ago, before games began and even prior to the first practice. So I sent a different pair of shoes with him to practice on Tuesday and his father, who also happens to be coaching, noticed. Damn.

So Wednesday I began calling all over trying to locate this exact pair of shoes in the exact size we had already purchased them in so we could replace them without soon-to-be-ex ever knowing. (I think I will just start calling him STBE for "soon-to-be-ex" - any objections? - oh, wait, you have to have people who read your blog before there are even people to object... it stays!) So I find a pair (thank God) and get my mom to come over and watch the daycare kids so I can go buy them before practice on Thursday. These shoes are for my 12-year-old and when I picked them up, I realized how big they were. I mean, I know kids grow, but come on! So I decided to try them on just to see how tight they would be on my foot. And to my horror... They fit ME! And I have fairly decent size feet for a woman. I usually wear an 8 1/2 or 9 (although sometimes an 8 fits me just fine - go figure). So I got home and started looking at his shoes and THEY ALL FIT ME. So I go to my next-youngest child's shoes and THEY FIT ME TOO. He is 9. NINE and his shoes fit me. These kids are going to be giants. Soon, I am going to have to look UP when I talk to them. Half of the intimidation factor is that I am bigger and could probably kick their asses if I need to. So now I have to find something else to intimidate them with. Maybe their giant shoes?

So I told the two of them that even after basketball season is over, they are not allowed to wear their court shoes outside so that I could have them when they outgrow them. They thought I was joking. I wasn't. :)